I have decided to seek out some grief buddies following the loss of my Dad.
Firstly I want to check out that some of what I am going through is perfectly normal and not just me losing the plot.
Secondly. I know that peer support helps and if suffering, why not reach out and help someone else along the way too?
Thirdly, I don’t want to keep putting all my needs on close family members particularly my husband. He misses Dad too but prefers to be all stoic whereas I want to reflect, rant and rave being more of an emotional creature.
Last night we argued when he disappeared outside for a cigarette. This has happened 3 times in the couple of weeks since Dad died. I don’t know why but suspect it is probably to do with a fear of losing someone else but these disappearances even if just for a few minutes infuriate me. He can’t see why something he does normally can bother me so much at the moment.
I can see his logic but it does not stop me feeling alone and scared.
Then there is the extreme tiredness that descends on me. Apparently this is a perfectly normal response to grief but it helps to know that for sure, right?
Also it would be good to share stories of our loved ones and learn to focus on how lucky we were to have them in our lives.
Penny over at the Alexander Residence blog writes well about loss in her Little Legacy posts so if you have not seen them and have lost someone, they might help you.
I am lucky to have support from my family and also many fantastic online friends already but perhaps if you are in the days, weeks and months following loss, we can connect usefully.
Leave me a comment or find me on Twitter @kateonthinice