Yesterday, I was ill with a really debilitating tummy bug.
When I told Him Indoors when he woke up, he said half-heartedly, “Do you need me to take the day off work?”
I was amazed that he even offered. He is one of those fellas who is obsessed with his work. Like many in the helping professions including myself in my time, he does not stick to firm boundaries. If a client needs help, he is there.
I asked whether he would be able to work from home now that he has a work laptop at home. “Well not really”, he says as he slipperily tried to get out of looking after me for the day.
My concern was that if my elderly father who lives with us was ill too and the children went to school, who would be able to pick them up if they were ill? We live about 4 miles from the school with no public transport provision and I don’t drive. My youngest was ill on Sunday and Monday so it did appear that the bug was starting to work its way through the family.
In the end, my lovely husband stayed. To be fair, he did manage to make me a few coffees during the day and lob some tablets my way. Apart from that, he spent most of the day on his laptop attending to work emails.
No cuddles, not much in the way of kind words, a manner very much like a caged animal desperate to escape to the world outside.
I was actually relieved when the call came from school to say my daughter needed to come home as she had vomited as this proved that we did actually need him to stay at home.
It is strike day today and guess who is at home looking after the children? That would be me then. Despite having far better qualifications than my husband and despite having once held senior positions out in the real world, I am the stay at home Mum cos life seems to work like that which I still think is grossly unfair.
I am sick of being told that I am lucky because my husband does some houswework and cooks. Why shouldn’t he? I know that I am fortunate that he is in a secure job with a liveable wage. I still am that uppity cow who thinks I should have a job and a wage too without childcare costs being so high as to make work seem like a silly and self-defeating option. That is before you factor in inflexible, family-unfriendly employers.
I want a life of my own out there in the world. I feel like a caged animal too but, unlike you, dearest, I don’t get to return to the world the next day.
Maybe, I should do what people keep telling me to and get that novel written. Family-friendly hours, no childcare costs and my name in lights. That sounds really good if a pipedream at the minute.
Oh and while I am at it, I will put in an order for a bloke with a good bedside manner.
If you leave a comment, why not tell me what else you think should be on my wishlist. I am very open to new ideas.
Originally posted 2011-11-30 11:34:54.