Is putting things off a good or bad idea? I suspect delaying things can be both depending on the situation involved. The Best Boot Forward questions this week are all about such matters so I will answer them as best I can.
1.What are you putting off?
I am putting less things off to be honest partly because I faced up to the fact that I was doing so when I wrote these questions last week. Paperwork of various sorts was getting on top of me and I worked out if it was stressing me out so much I would probably feel way better for tackling it.
In my life, I have put off looking after my mental and physical wellbeing. That has changed in recent years and although there is more work to do on the physical side of things, I am taking action and feeling better for that. Never neglect your wellbeing – it is not good for you but also terrible for those around you.
The other area I put off was looking after my relationship. Who knew? They take work and hard work at that. Like many mums, I put the children first which is great but can mean you neglect who you are and also who the “us” that made the children in the first place is/was. At the start of the year I reflected that my marriage was stale. Somehow again the magic of acknowledging that has made things improve. We are going out more, communicating better and perhaps learning to adapt to a new chapter in our lives. I am still not 100 per cent happy with the relationship but the friendship that got us together in the first place is back and that’s a good foundation for future progress.
2.How does putting it off make you feel?
Putting things off like paperwork and work tasks ends up making me feel very stressed. In fact last week it resulted in tears which is most unusual these days. I knew that was a warning sign and took action.
Putting off looking after my wellbeing resulted in 10 years of depression and mental health difficulties. The only good to come of that is that I can hopefully act as a warning to others and also that I really value my happiness nowadays.
Putting off the work on my relationship made me seriously question whether I wanted to stay in it. It also led to boredom on both sides. We had different strategies for dealing with that but we could have kept the spark if we had watched our partnership with a little more vigilance along the way.
3.What would happen if you took action instead of procrastinating?
It appears that taking action even if baby steps does work wonders but also makes me feel empowered. I have really recognised that the tiniest step taken should be celebrated and that suddenly a momentum builds up and things can change radically for the better.
4.How risky is the gamble you are taking by putting something off?
They say life is too short. My brother died young last year but he lived in a full-on way whilst he was on the planet despite health issues from a very early age. That gave me great comfort during the grieving journey. I hope when I die my children can say that I lived!
Some things can be put off positively I think. I don’t need to write that novel. I don’t need to be a perfect mum or educator. I should make my own choices and they may be new ones.
Well those are my thoughts on delaying things in life for what they are worth.