I have a tradition of posting my worst bits of the BritMums Live weekend on my blog. All of this is honest but also some playful points and why not?
1. Trying on dresses and my daughter telling me that one I was considering was “way too short”
2. Trying on more outfits and Him Indoors saying he liked all of them – lovely but unhelpful
3. Attempting not to spill breakfast sarnie down my dress on the way.
4. Finding out my hotel room was on the 5th floor! Have you seen my twisted ankle?
5. The cups at the Montcalm – I like the look but I always get confused and end up spilling my drink.
6. The feat of two pairs of knickers engineering required to hold up my tights. Why are tights always so short?
7. Knowing someone was blanking me – I am not without intelligence.
8. Not getting to speak to enough people – I never do!
9. Missing bloggers who were not able to be there.
10. Not recognising Deliciously Ella when I do really know what she looks like and am a huge fan
11. Not having a pen with me on arrival – unprofessional of me!
12. Not greeting Katy Hill on reception so I could show off the results of her inspiring me to lose weight
13. The pain, hobbling and tubular bandage of the twisted ankle – great timing there Kate!
14. Being assaulted behind my a certain breast friend and others
15. Forgetting my bank card and leaving my money in my suitcase
16. Not talking to brands as much as I would like or should
17. Not having met my target weight for BritMums Live – really got me down in the run-up to the weekend – stupid of me but there it is.
18. Being a good girl and remaining sober throughout in case I fell over again
19. Being known a little too well by the Carry on Camping Team!
20. Too much noise over dinner when I knew great conversations were to be had with fascinating people.
21. Introducing myself as an expert in wet knickers to Carol Smillie of Diary Doll. You really need to check out her pants and you will be ready for anything.
22. Not seeing people I wanted to connect with and seeing them from afar and not being able to get to them in time.
23. Losing my present from my giveaway winner and my BritMums Live bracelet.
24. Getting the wrong end of the stick and fearing I was about to lose a special friend.
25. Forgetting to phone home!
26. Having to accept help in view of the ankle – not a great skill of mine.
27. Not always recognising people – does anyone else struggle with this and nearly always people I am massively fond of too.
28. The usual sidelong glances to try and work out who people are without showing too much interest in their bosoms.
29. A little daunted feeling as Room 3 got fuller and fuller. Felt the fear and did it anyway.
30. Surnames and making a crass comment about psoriasis in one of my sessions. Enough said!
31. Realising I still have not written that book.
32. Wishing wine had labels on them.
33. My phone playing up
34. Being referred to as a wallflower who looked awful, a loser, worthless and wrinkly! You know who you are ladies!
35. Realising I did not look QUITE as good as Caprice.
Fear not! I do have best bits of the weekend – watch this space!
Postscript On point 34, the women who said these things are big supporters so yes in jest and also highlighting how I can be self-deprecating. The comments were said with affection and taken as such and probably would be better listed on my best bits.
Check out what other people thought about BritMums Live and link up your posts over on BritMums.