You find me in an upbeat mood. I am on the bed which has freshly-laundered white cotton bedding. Looking through the window I see blue skies, fluffy clouds and trees. If I look up I can see a picture of my late parents smiling away under a palm tree. Dad is gazing at mum like she is the most beautiful woman on the planet and she is grinning. I am surrounded by daily to-do lists, books, a magazine and a notebook. I can hear birds tweeting glad there are less humans around no doubt. I cannot really smell much except fresh air coming in my open window. As for taste, I have just finished a crab sandwich. I thought I did not like crab but I was wrong and so pleased my brother persuaded me to try it.
We have had good weather for a lot of the week and one day was a little too hot for me really. I need some summer shoes as the black boots just don’t work in this weather. Thank goodness for online shopping and George at Asda. They did not have the ones I wanted in my size but it is good to get something a little different sometimes. I also ordered some for my son who had a fall this week but is OK. He does not feel his current shoes are right for him so a new pair seemed in order. I also put a pale pink jacket/hoodie into the shopping basket as the weather is much warmer than when I arrived so my big winter coat is a bit much.
I am getting a lot of rest and relaxation here which I think I needed. I am sleeping so well. Food is plentiful and lovely and usually cooked for me. Having said that I enjoy taking my turn now and again and will be preparing fish and chips tonight.
I have a mobile phone functioning now and have even entered the exciting world of Whatsapp which is helping me maintain good levels of contact with my teenage son overseas. I got multiple texts from my husband this morning. I have also bonded with someone online and found their advice helpful.
Entertainment wise it is largely talks with my brother and son. We laugh a lot and as a very odd mix of ages and interests get on fine almost all of the time. I find it an absolute joy to have my son just over the way from me when I go to bed and when I wake up. I watch telly a lot with my brother and we like the same sort of things. I am continuing to enjoy The Last Kingdom all about the Vikings with my son and he is keen for us to try Peaky Blinders.
When I come to bed I try to check in to the Emma Kenny Live Clinics which I highly recommend for anyone who wants to keep their head straight and we all do whether we have severe or mild mental health issues or are just finding this whole period a bit weird. I am doing a lot of work on myself to be honest. I am learning to accept that people will not always do what I want them to do and that it is all about how I choose to react to those situations. I am working out that as an adopted person I can feel rejected very easily. I intend to read up and work on that moving forwards. I was watching the Prue Leith documentary about her adopted daughter. I asked my brother how he saw my past and he said something like “your life started when you came to us”. He meant it nicely but the truth is I arrived with my adoptive family when I was nearly a year old. My whole past matters and I am realising that the loss of birth parents has to be traumatic so there are reasons I struggle sometimes and that is OK. It does not make me odd or a bad person.
On the blogging front my statistics are increasing quite a lot which is pleasing. I received some luxury soaps and lotion to review and also a pretty laundry basket.
I have enjoyed housework too as here it is a choice and always less challenging when in somebody else’s space.
I feel I have the time, space and peace to think and to work out what I want moving forwards. As I research, I find there are so many potential futures out there to investigate. I had a great chat with my eldest son who thinks I may be able to pull off having everything I want. I have done that many times before – the future is different but it can be a bright one!
What is making you feel upbeat this week?