How To Handle Money In Relationships

How to handle money in relationships

They say relationship problems are often triggered by money issues. It certainly causes angst in my own marriage as my husband by his own admission is rubbish at managing money so all the sensible thinking and a lot of the income-generating  falls on my shoulders. Do you know how to handle money in relationships?

I recently read a survey from Shepherds Friendly Society who teamed up with psychologist and relationship expert, Dr Becky Spelman to find out more about how people think money should be handled in relationships. Does money really have the power to make or break a relationship?

The survey looked at different milestones in relationships when it comes to money. It covers things like who should pay the bill on a date night right down to whether people would split up with a partner if they became bankrupt.

There were some surprises to me in the survey findings. For example, one result was that more men than women feel men should pay on date night. This contrasted with another finding that more younger women than men felt the bill should be split.

I found it fascinating that money can make a person be more attractive to some people. I have never fancied anyone based on the size of their bank balance. In fact, my two long-term partners were unemployed when I met them. If I was to look for a new partner, I would want to ensure they had some financial security. It’s no fun constantly propping someone up who does not have money in the bank. It’s OK in the first stages of a relationship when love is still blind but it is not helpful when the bills arrive.

I was interested to see some different results for heterosexual couples compared with same sex couples. For example, same sex couples were more likely to keep their finances separate.

Check out the survey to find out more and to access sensible advice moving on in your romantic and financial lives.

Do you have any advice on how to handle money in relationships to share with my readers?

How To Handle Money In Relationships



Award-winning writer, blogger, social media consultant and charity campaigner. Social Media Manager for BritMums, the UK's largest parent blogging network Freelance clients include Firefly Communications and Save the Children UK. Works with brands on marketing projects. Examples include Visit Orlando, Give As You Live, Coca-Cola and Kodak. Cambridge Law graduate with many years experience working across three sectors in advice, media relations, events, training and project management. Available for hire at affordable rates.


  • John Adams

    Oh my word Kate, nothing like money to complicate a relationship (or lack of it….). I think you’re right, when younger you tend to be more liberal about these things but with age I guess you do want someone who can at least buy their own clothes etc. This, however, is possibly a bit rich coming from a man whose wife is the main earner! May have to see what the survey says about couples like Mrs Adams and I actually. Would be interesting to see how other couple with a stay at home dad work out their finances. Heading over from #thatfridaylinky

  • John Adams

    This is fascinating. My eldest is only 9 but I see her facing peer pressure now. Not, you’ll understand, that she’s coming to me asking about drugs etc but I see pressure to fit in with clothes and tech gadgets. Well on the way to proper teenagehood! Blog posts like this by more experienced parents always leave me terrified as they leave little to the imagination as to what’s coming my way! Headed over from #thatfridaylinky

  • Nige

    We both handle the money and it’s all in the same pot it’s ours together no arguments then great read Thank you for linking to #Thatfridaylinky please come back next week

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