Reasons I struggle with home education

I want to write about the reasons I struggle with home education because it will stop the thoughts and feelings whirring in my head so much. I  am not against home education but I really struggle on almost a daily basis so I want to share the reasons why that is the case.

It wasn’t my choice

I am freedom-loving by nature and I did not choose home education as such. It chose me when my daughter was bullied by pupils and her Head Teacher. I was interested in home educating when I became a mother but my husband ruled it out so I went down the traditional route placing my children in schools. When my daughter was threatening self-harm that had to change and quickly in her case and her brother did not feel he should go to school if she did not. Perhaps I gave in too easily in his case but it was a very stressful time. That’s just the first reason I struggle with home education.

I have a lot on

The truth is that the bulk of housework falls on my shoulders. I try so hard to keep the house clean and tidy but with dogs in particular and children too that can be challenging. I seem to go from room to room spotting dirty surfaces, floors that need sweeping/steaming, toilets that need flushing/cleaning and so on. It is endless and soul-destroying.

I am also not in the privileged position of having a husband on a great wage so I need to make money. I have the flexibility of freelancing  but also the pressure of constantly having to find work which has been in short supply recently.

I do think it is important that there is something of me left in the mix too to avoid collapsing into depression so I am taking more time out to read, listen to music and so on.

My children have different learning styles

I think I could do OK if I was home-educating just one child but I have two on this journey and they have very different needs and learning styles. My daughter is like me, able to decide what her passions are and to pursue them with impressive focus. She is quite self-sufficient but I worry that she is doing things she likes rather than covering all the things that would be covered in a school environment. My son has passions too but would spend all his time gaming if I let him. He likes to learn with me cuddled up doing work-sheets or whatever. I struggle with home education because I do not know how to balance their needs.

I don’t know what I am doing

I don’t have teaching qualifications. I am relatively bright and I had a good education but how does this equip me to teach my children adequately? I veer between being convinced of different schools of thought regarding home education anything from leave them to their own devices and see what emerges through to a focus on the National Curriculum. Then I get myself in a tizz wondering why we need to know the stuff in the National Curriculum most of which seems fairly irrelevant to life skills and jobs except in the most specialist areas. Then I convince myself I am neglecting my children by taking them out of school in the first place. Then I start envying parents  who send their children to school or even put them in boarding school so they can leave it to the perceived experts and not have to worry too much. I don’t know what is the right or wrong thing to do or even if such things exist.

I get very little help

As with so many areas of life, I get very little help from my husband who initially said he would take on the  maths and science teaching. In three years or so that has equated to two kitchen science experiments and a few maths worksheets. I am a baby I suppose but I just feel like screaming and do sometimes “It’s not fair!”

Don’t get me wrong! I do think home education has loads to offer and I see other parents carrying it off with aplomb. It can be magical and I want it to be for us but I am in the mix so perhaps that is impossible.

Well, I am glad I got that off my chest and will be sharing wobbles from other home education parents soon.

 

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14 Comments

  1. Kim May 22, 2018 / 7:19 pm

    Oh my gosh! It felt like I was reading my story! I wish I knew what to do.

  2. This Scribbler Mum May 22, 2018 / 8:13 pm

    I can imagine your predicament. I have not done homeschooling myself but my friend’s kids are homeschooled. What my friend does is have a consistent schedule for them when to study much like in school and a dedicated area to study. It helps her compartmentalize her day. You probably already do the same. Wish I could give any tips. #DreamTeam

  3. RawMum May 23, 2018 / 9:15 am

    Some really good insights here. As a teacher I can actually see both sides have merits and downfalls. I hope you can find some balance and do remember that teachers have specialisms too. Perhaps you can find another home educator who could balance your skills and share the burden? #dreamteam

  4. Michele @ Confessions of Parenting May 23, 2018 / 4:06 pm

    I couldn’t agree more with everything you are saying! The learning style thing is huge! None of my kids learn the same way. I think I would spend my whole day running around trying to teach everyone the same thing differently. Thank you so much for sharing! #WanderingWednesday

  5. Liz May 23, 2018 / 7:10 pm

    I love your honesty here and I definitely wouldn’t judge you for sending your kids to school! I too am thinking about homeschooling past preschool, but it is a lot of extra on a parent. Lots of reading about “how to”, juggling multiple ages, and sometimes literally no alone time. I love what someone told me which is that its ok to homeschool knowing that you can always change your mind. It’s taken the pressure off feeling like I have to decide the next decade by this year, haha! Good luck and good job! #wanderingwednesday

  6. MMT May 24, 2018 / 8:19 pm

    I applaud your honesty Kate – it’s always interesting to hear both sides. I wouldn’t have a clue where to start with home schooling, but I appreciate since reading this, there may be times in life when it is the best option. We’d do anything for the ones we love right? Good luck and I’m sure there is support out there, you just need to find it xxx
    Thanks for linking to #coolmumclub

  7. charlotte Stein May 25, 2018 / 2:27 pm

    I would very much struggle with the balancing act of housework and teaching. I think the fact that you juggle everything shows determination that you will pass on to them#coolmumclub

  8. Tracy Albiero May 25, 2018 / 4:09 pm

    I am a teacher and am not sure I could homeschool my kiddo. It is not easy. Kids listen to their teachers better than parents. #thatfridaylinky

  9. Nige May 27, 2018 / 7:19 am

    I couldn’t home ed so respect to anybody that does tough balancing everything Thank you for linking to #Thatfridaylinky please come back next week

  10. Heather Keet May 28, 2018 / 12:29 pm

    It must be so difficult to school at home and such a shame that you are forced to do so by a school system that failed your daughter. I’m so sorry she even had to experience bullying, and from a teacher!! #DreamTeam

  11. Michelle Kellogg May 28, 2018 / 1:52 pm

    I can’t do the home education thing so I greatly respect those that do. It does sound like a stressful thing to add to an ever-growing list of things to do. I hope you are able to find some me time for yourself to unwind and recharge. #BloggerClubUK

  12. Helena May 28, 2018 / 3:19 pm

    I’m TEFL trained so understand that people learn in different ways through my studies. I also understand about the housework too. I wonder if there is someone you admire who homeschools that you could talk to regards your wobbles and perhaps learn from. They in turn may have different wobbles that you could help them with and by talking with them about their learning of home ed you will help in reinforcing their learning. #TriumphantTales

  13. Jaki May 28, 2018 / 5:44 pm

    I take my hat off to you, I don’t think it is something I could do. Thanks for sharing with #TriumphantTales.

  14. Sarah May 30, 2018 / 8:54 pm

    I seriously admire people who home educate, I am not sure it is something I could do as I know I would be panicking all the time about whether I was doing the right things! Thanks for sharing with #thursdayteam

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