Becoming a mum changes your life in amazing ways leading you to feel deep love and to learn about just how strong and capable you are. However, it is not unusual for mums to want to rediscover themselves away from the label of “Sarah’s mum” or other labels that we pick up along the way. Do you want to rediscover yourself and how can you do it?
Do it your way
There are so many websites and blogs that will tell you how to live your life. Everyone appears to have the answer but actually you need to remember that you know yourself best. Take 5 minutes even if it is on the loo and reflect on who you were before you became a mum. What do you want out of life? What are your interests?
Take baby steps to rediscover who you are
When I started to change I took really tiny steps and celebrated each one. Not that long ago I struggled to even leave the house and walk around the block. I forced myself to do that and praised myself when I did. Before I knew it I was getting a new job and flying to America. It seems to impossible sometimes but you can change your life one baby step at a time.
Use your support network
Do you have family and friends who could look after your children so you can carve out some me time? Often people do not offer to help but would be more than willing to do so if you summoned up the courage to ask them. When I was getting down, my brother hatched a plan with my dad to get me away for a weekend. It gave me that sense of freedom and gave me time to think and feel about something other than the children.
Look after your physical and mental health
Would you feel better if you shed some weight or perhaps put some on? Weight issues can get women very down in the dumps. I might not like that society makes us feel that way but it still is the case. I was interested to read the HYPOXI Knightsbridge blog which has some really helpful articles on weight loss and exercise.
How are you really feeling? We all have low days and it is normal to be sad when unhappy things come to our attention. However, if you cannot seem to shift a low mood and are not motivated at all, check your mental health. If you are not looking forward to anything and you are struggling to see a point in getting out of bed, you may be suffering from depression. There is no shame in that and your GP can help you via medication and/or talking therapies.
Invest in yourself
You are not going to feel great about yourself if you never spend money on yourself. I put money towards my children and husband which is of course fine but I took this to an extreme. Once I started treating myself initially in charity shops or by getting a haircut, I began to feel a sense of self again. This improved my confidence and great things followed. As I have said before baby steps can lead to momentous changes in time. I am now actively considering getting my teeth fixed. For you it might be a package with HPOXI machines to help you tone up. As I have said before you decide exactly how you invest in yourself.
By taking time to look after yourself, note that you are actually being selfless rather than selfish. You cannot keep giving out without getting exhausted or resentful. Neither of these emotional states leads to positive relationships with your partner and children. Take care of yourself and you will be much better at looking after other people too. If you nurture yourself, you are providing a brilliant role model for your children.
Do you have tips for how to rediscover yourself as a mum?